Friday May 2nd, 2003
Keeping the site up
It's May 2nd and the site's still up. Not for the reasons you might
think. "If everyone reading this just donated one dollar..." Apparently
four people were reading. I got a ton of e-mail from over twenty
countries and the majority of it said one of three things:
1. You suck. Quit whining. No one's going to actually donate and no one
cares about you. Take your site down, get a job (I have two jobs but for
some reason people keep writing this) and start exercising you tubby
bitch.
2. Don't take you're site down!!! I read it every week and it gives me
hope. Your site is hilarious and I look forward to reading what happens
next. You're my own personal soap opera. I'd send you a buck but I'm poor and/or don't have access to pay pal.
3. Your site is very cool. You seem like an intelligent guy, and as much
as I like the site I think your time would be better spent living your own
life and trying to succeed with women rather than taking the time and
money to write about it.
So why did I keep it up? Because I agree with all three points of view.
I have been a whiney bitch lately. After things have been building up for
a long time I get hate mail, bills, and a box of shit sent to me all at
once. Not an excuse, just an explanation. I'm keeping the site up for
all the people who say that they love what I'm doing. To quote one writer
who wishes to remain anonymous,
"You're putting it all out on the line. You say you're shy but to put
this site on the net and say, "I may be a pudgy nerd but I will not be
ignored." takes more balls than anyone I know. You're the voice, speaking
out for people across the world and challenging the falsely spoken ideal
that states looks don't matter and it's what's on the inside that counts.
You said you don't want to be a martyr for ugly people? Well martyr's
rarely choose their role. You are making a difference and motivating
people like me to look at people in a different way. Keep fighting a good
fight and don't let a box of shit get you down. Oh yea I'd send a buck
but I'm poor too."
--Anonymous
The whole e-mail was three pages long and later he compared me to Jesus Christ. Now I don't necessarily agree with everything he said but it is good to know that people are being affected by my site. I started this site to meet some people and maybe get a sponsor to fund my pursuit of the opposite sex but it seems to have become something more.
Yesterday I had a three-hour debate about the fundamental differencebetween a cupcake and a muffin. (Dave the intern says the only difference is icing but he's a damned fool.) That's the excitement level of my life when I'm not working on this site. For the last few years I've been in a haze where one day bleeds into the next and I get to sleep in on the weekends. The truth is the site motivates me. If I didn't feel that I had thousands of people to report to I'd spend a Friday night with Stargate SG-1 and Papa Johns rather than trying to build up the courage to talk to the blonde in the black mini at the end of the bar. Before the creation of this site I didn't know how many all girls schools there were on the east coast or that you can suffer dehydration from ex-lax brownies. All things considered it's been a wild ride so far and I'm as interested as you to see where it will take me.
Related articles:
Ex-Lax Brownies
Box o' Shit
