Propaganda
This section will be dedicated to me just speaking about current events, and making up stuff that has to do with current events. My journal format doesn't give me a chance to talk about this stuff enough so since I get a ton of requests about my opinion on various things. (God knows why) here is where I'll address them.
"The Starwars Kid"
Recently I've gotten a number of e-mails that basically said, "Dude it could be worse, check this out." And than either an attachment (Which I don't open on my computer to avoid another virus incident) or a link to one of the many sites like this www.jedimaster.net I am of course referring to, "The Starwars kid." For those of you who don't know the Starwars Kid is a 15 year-old overweight dorky kid who was goofing off in front of a camera one day. He was swinging a broomstick (Or something to that effect) wildly, and sporting some martial arts moves that look like a dancer having an epileptic fit during a ballet performance. Due to the intrinsic comedic value of his performance the video that hit the internet last November has since been downloaded by an estimated 10 million internet users. I've even read articles about how his family had to move because of the public embarrassment and that the kid in question is now in a mental facility.
- The story of the Starwars kid has taught me two things:
- I should erase all the videos of me playing with my Barbies before they hit the internet.
- I need to stop being so self-conscious when I go out to meet women.
If I can make that jump from the creepy fat guy staring a girl down from the corner of the bar to a tubby fifteen year old dancing gleefully with a curtain rod on camera, than I just may have a shot at getting a woman.
Review of "Bring it on"
After borrowing my friend Jake's DVD collection (See Journal Entry October 29th, and November 3rd) I made a comment on my site about not being able to believe he owned "Bring it on." Jake took exception to this and told me that the film is an hour and a half of barely clothed high school girls with dialogue humorously worse than "Starship Troopers." I actually own "Starship Troopers" on DVD due to both the hilarious dialogue and excessive gore. In order to decide if I owe Jake an apology or ass whoopin' I've decided to sit down and actually watch this PG rated film about two rival cheerleading teams.
Watching this movie is like being stuck in traffic slowly driving by the result of an accident between a car full of clowns and a bus of catholic school girls. The dialogue is remarkably bad. It is quite impressive that someone wrote this script and got another human being to read it and not take their own life.
I do have to admit that one scene stood out as being much funnier than the rest of the movie. This is of course due to the comedic genius of Peyton Reed who I had previously only known from his work on the Comedy Central sketch comedy series "Upright Citizens Brigade." Delivering lines like, "Cheerleaders are like dancers who have gone retarded" in a way that only he can, it felt like a cool spring oasis in the middle of a comedic desert of a film. Compare this to other lines like "Brittney this is not a democracy this is a cheerocracy, I'm afraid I'm over ruling you." To which Brittney responds, "You are being a total cheertator!"
At one point my brother walked in as I was pouring my second shot of tequila and they were talking about how to earn money for a new routine. He casually said, "How about a car wash?" As we began discussing how bad and predictable the movie was I looked up to see them actually washing cars. This movie reminds me of high budget 1980's porn that was edited to be shown on Cinemax. The dialogue is so bad it's good and than bad again. I'd rather not take up too much more time with this so I'll just say that "Bring it on" is one of those movies that can be enjoyed if you're drunk and in the company of extremely sarcastic friends. My brother however referred to it as a cinematic abortion that is a reflection of all that is wrong with the movie industry and said that if it was not a friends copy his moral obligation to burn it would out weigh his respect for my stuff. Of course Scott's a prick so what do you expect.
The first entry was posted September 18th, 2003 More is to come
